We should have a national friendship day. A day for those friends who the worst gossip has no affect on, the ones who have your back through thick and thin, the ones who’d never snitch about what you did to the evil man people are searching for, because after all, he deserved it, the friends who would never back up, because you take anti-depressants, since they know how miserable you would be without them, a special celebration, for the gangsta friends, who are always happy to keep in touch with you on the low, the ones who would never say a mumbling word against you, because after all, you did witness them shooting into a crowded room before, even though everyone else thought the basketball game would be the only action going on that night, and you also know about that time they all stole from high quality stores, and snatched bags from decrepit older individuals, who had it coming, because the older you are, the more negative karma surely must have been collected. Friends who you’ve known for years who wouldn’t care about whatever the cops have you on camera doing, who would never judge you, or turn against you, because you always had a reason for what you did, even if it was because other people picked with you until you just popped like poppcorn, full of energy that true friends could respect even more, because true friends are always in our hearts, even if we can’t be seen with them in daylight, until news stories cool down. Friendship day is special, because the real mob may be those who you know, the people who would never help an investigator to bug your home or aid security talk you out of financial growth that Suze Orman would even smile about. It’s a day for the playas who make hide and go seek more fun, the pals who lay low, the friendships that noone could ever disintegrate- friends for life.


About comedianmissywilson

stand-up comedian
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